I have written and erased several times today both mentally and on paper and I decided that I have one thing that is truly on my heart tonight. I am probably going to step on some toes with this one, but please know that is not my intention. I am struggling big time with something and I have been in prayer about it and I told Y’all we were going to share in all the “stuff” together. So as much as I love the good fuzzy feeling, tonight is not that.
I love being a part of a church family. If I need prayer, I can call someone and when someone is in need, we can all help. I love that. We are members at a church here in town but the more I learn about the behind the scenes of a church, the more questions I have. The first thing I had to come to grips with is that although they are churches, they are being ran by humans who have the same sin tendency that I have inside of me. The second thing I had to learn is that just because they have a title in a church, does not make them better than or more holy than anyone else. Once I got past that, it was easier to see it for what it was.
I launched anchor 180 with excitement because I believe that we should all strive to be the hands and feet of Jesus each day no matter where we are and in any line of work, we are in. I was so excited to bring my past together with the word of God to teach and speak to students in the surrounding youth groups. I got so much support from many of the surrounding churches but noticed that not all churches were welcoming because Anchor 180 was not one of their in-home ministries. I was surprised that as the church, they wouldn’t welcome redemption and grace into their services. Now I have noticed that there is an overwhelming competition between churches for numbers, members, students, MONEY, ministry etc. It is no longer a personal issue for me but a matter of how I want my children to see the life of Jesus portrayed through the people I surround them with.
When I am taking my kids to church, I know they are watching and listening to their teachers, the ministers and the parents around them. The bible lesson is good but what are they learning from the actions of those adults after they leave Sunday school? I must ask myself, if the walls came tumbling down and all the big lights and stages went away and all that was left was the people inside of the church, would we be successful at bringing people to Christ? Would we be left with greed and selfishness or would there still be passion and love? Would we be offering the glory to God or was it glory for us? For our individual churches? Would it be about praising God because the church across town baptized 10 students OR anger because we only baptized 8? Are we truly worried about being the hands and feet of Jesus everywhere we go or is it only good if we recognize the church with which we attend on Sunday Mornings? If we took the logo off the shirt and did ministry in our community or in a different building, would it still be good ministry if our church didn’t think of it first?
I don’t remember a place in the bible where Jesus wasn’t happy that someone knew who he was and wanted to follow and trust in God just because he wasn’t the one to tell them about it. I sometimes think that we get so wrapped up in who is getting the glory that we forget it was never ours to have in the first place. So instead of truly loving the way we are supposed to, the ugliness of greed takes over and we miss out on amazing opportunities to share and be disciples of Christ.
I want my kids to know that if someone’s shirt has different church logo, it DOES NOT MEAN that we aren’t a part of the same mission. It simply means that we worship God in a different place on Sunday mornings. We are bonded together as sisters and brothers in Christ and we are in the same battle, cheering each other on. We rejoice in their success and pray through their heartache. I TRULY believe if we could knock the walls down and band together, our work would make a much bigger impact. Stop competing against each other and start competing against Satan. It isn’t us against each other. It is us against the enemy! NEWS FLASH! The church across town isn’t the enemy!
I pray that there would be unity and less pride when making decisions. I pray that although we have human error, we would continue praying for our church leaders that they could see the beauty in ministry regardless if it is theirs or someone else’s. I pray for great mentors for both me and my children so that they could become the best they could possibly be. Most of all, I pray that even in times of frustration, I myself, would search God and not other human beings for guidance, wisdom and peace.
You guys are such precious friends for letting me share with you how gosh darn screwed up I am sometimes and the struggles I battle on a daily basis. I thank you for your grace and community and I thank God he has offered me an outlet to share my life with others. Have the most amazing week.
All Glory To God,