Dear single mom-
You made it to the end of another day! You’re tired! Another week is upon us and while everyone is planning their weekend shenanigans, you’re looking at the loads of laundry already piling up and the kids who will be home all weekend. For some of you, the bills sucked up your whole paycheck and you’re doing your best to stretch pennies to get the necessities for another week ahead.
As if work isn’t enough. You have a week filled
with after school activities, homework, end of the year parties and a list that
doesn’t seem to end. The mom guilt is setting in because taking the day off to
attend the field trips and the field days isn’t possible. You scroll through
your social media page and everyone is planning their summer vacations while all
you are trying to plan is the summer daycare arrangements for your kids.
You absolutely adore your kids but disciplining, cleaning, laundry, grocery shopping, carpooling, providing, talking and being everything to everyone is somedays more than you can handle. You feel So over committed and overwhelmed that somedays all you can do is cry. The days seem longer than ever before and the sleep not enough. You just need a break!
Not a big vacation, but just a bathroom to yourself or a meal that is still warm by the time you sit down to enjoy it. An entire tv show without interruption! You are living a life you never dreamed of living and although people keep telling you there’s a plan, you aren’t sure you can envision that. Maybe you’re still trying to figure out how in the world life got so off track! When you were a little girl, this was far from the happily ever after you dreamed of. The man you were once in love with now makes your stomach turn with anger or possibly a deep sadness every time you see him.
Oh, sweet friend, I see you and I pray for you. You are living a life I wouldn’t wish on my worst enemy. Can I encourage you to do something I never did? Just Do YOU! The time is going to pass whether you’re happy or angry so why not choose JOY?! Although it’s not perfect, it can be a season of life that you truly enjoy learning and rediscovering who you are! Read the books, ride your bike, watch the movies, paint your nails and fall in love with yourself again. More than anything, fall in love with Jesus. Search him and ask him for guidance. Don’t use this time to relive your teenage party years out of rebellion of what life has become but instead to grow and to become the woman you always dreamed you’d be.
Believe it or not, God does have a plan even during your struggle. Cry out to God and tell him what you want. I used to sit and cry and pray for things like a washer and dryer that I didn’t have to load up to get to. For a house big enough for everyone to have their open space and a man who would genuinely love me and my kids. Nothing too much, just a family and enough money to not worry about groceries seemed like the greatest blessing of all time.
I write to you specifically today because this last weekend I traveled with my daughters and husband to Phoenix for a concert and some shopping. As we drove, I reminisced on those long days as a single momma and I couldn’t help but think of you. I thought about those days that I couldn’t see past the chaos I called life. I thought about the longing I had for a family and felt and overwhelming thankfulness to God for giving me more than enough to make lifelong memories with my kids. For the husband that drove us that I love more than words could say.
Precious girl, it is the moments of today that will make those moments of the future so sweet. It is the strength that you are building through the lows that will give you the courage to thrive through the highs. It is the brokenness in the last relationship that will teach you to love better in the next relationship.
So, for today as you muster up enough courage to get through the humps of single parenting, don’t lose hope. Know you are loved, and you are stronger than you give yourself credit for. You are doing the very best with what you have. I promise you all your kids want is YOU! Cling to God and he will provide a life that you could not even dream of. Become the best version of you and you will begin seeing the best version of this life! It is tough but not impossible. Soon your future self will be in the midst of making some amazing memories and you will look back on this day and smile at how far you have come brave sister.
I wish I could give you a hug and tell you to give yourself some grace and look for the blessings of today. This too shall pass. I am so proud of you!
Thanking God for All of His blessings both Big and Small,